Growing Up standing for your own views

You get to a point where you no longer take everything you are told and taught for the only answer. You learn how to question and investigate things for yourself. Instead of maintaining a shallow and restricted view you instead have broadened your understanding of your world view. You read and study and learn how to explain your own reasoning's and why you stand behind what you do. This can be basically anything which presents a controversial aspect or view.

For example take the tattoos and piercings argument whether it is sinful or okay. I say if you want a tattoo don't make it unwholesome but go for it, and if you want a lip ring or something alright that's fine too. Now people especially what I view as those who want 'cookie cutter Christians' and think in the 'Americanized Christian' way would say I am completely wrong. Their support almost always taken from Leviticus. Well I can give a counter argument for that Leviticus source. It's Old Covenant not New Covenant. When Jesus came he established a New Covenant want to know about that try reading the new testament, I especially suggest focusing on Jesus' teachings directly and also read Romans. Leviticus was written to the Jews for that time frame under the old law...I am not a Jew I am not from that time frame and I am under the laws given to us through the grace of Jesus.  Not just that point but if you read further in Leviticus right around that very area where it is stated there are many laws which we do not follow anymore. How can you okay picking and choosing verses you can't! If you go about things in that way then the very foundation and holy aspect of the scriptures can be undermined. Because of studying on my own and finding those conclusions I now will gladly support tattoos and piercings, you aren't going to Hell for it and you aren't disobeying any command from God.

Did I always think that way? No I didn't. A big reason was because I was always more than willing to simply listen to whatever I was taught. I now jokingly call it being 'brainwashed'. Not questioning led me to at one point in my life frown upon anyone who swore, wanted tattoos, had piercings, or in some cases were what would be considered 'unchurched' or 'dirty'. That view minimized my ability to reach out to people and have as great of an impact on today's society. My Christian school, and many other Christian influences shut me down whenever I bring up these controversial issues, so instead I turned to my own researching and studying.

The traditional view that is held by many Christians today. or what I refer to as 'Americanized Christians', I would place being in the range of late thirties through to senior citizens, is in contrast to mine. Those opinions continuing to be held in my opinion can in part be held responsible for the current condition of my generation today. This youth feels like they are viewed only as 'dirty' and being of 'lesser worth' than those considered to be 'good Christians' and 'well churched'. How do those 'good Christians' expect to ever make an impact and help those hurting in this generation if they intend to waste their time harping on them about tattoos and piercings. That becoming their main target to 'shape them into perfect cookie cutter church Christians' pushes the important issues to a back burner. They'll help answer their questions about God, or Jesus, or life in general after they fit 'their perfect mold'.

I'll be honest for a long time I agreed with what they felt was 'bad'. Now my opinion has changed and it is because of the people I met. I realized that they weren't 'bad sinners' they were people. They were hurting and looking for answers but I watched 'church people' stand back and discuss what they needed to 'fix' or 'change' first. I realized I didn't keep the same views anymore and to begin with I thought maybe I was wrong but no I've really put a lot of research into this.

So yeah I still love those people around me who may continue to keep these, in my opinion, misguided views. I am not surprised so many people hold those views because it is what the 'Americanized church' or 'Americanized Christian' has become. It is sad though especially when I see it turning people away from the church more often then changing lives for the better.

So no I don't get 'brainwashed' anymore and I don't simply accept everything without ever questioning. After all the 'Reformation' stressed the point of the people accepting whatever was taught to them because they didn't know better. Come on people wake up! We do know better we have the resources and still we blindly follow! I've grown up! Have you?

Doubting and questioning everything

Has anyone else ever reached a point where you just want to start questioning everything? Or maybe doubting everything you thought you knew?

I never thought I would be one of those people who took a step back and thought 'wow maybe I have been seeing stuff wrong this whole time'. Well I am basically at that point now.

And you know what I'm fine with it. Maybe it's time for me to start questioning people, and their motives. Maybe I need to stop giving everyone the benefit of the doubt and start telling people what I really think. Maybe what I've thought was wrong could actually be right and what I always assumed was the right thing for me to do could actually be misguided?

So yeah I may still smile and have the same 'attitude' but my eyes are open now. People don't get to just use me and know I'll be there whenever they decide they need me in their life again. From now on you make me upset you'll know it and you'll know it to your face. From now on I'm going to openly question and doubt facts and believes so prove it to me...and it better be good!

Because you know why? Sometimes in life those moments come up where you actually have every reason to question and doubt everything. I'm in one of those points now and I'm going to use every second of it to figure out where I'm actually going.

Am I still me?

I'm trying so hard. I'm trying to be strong and still maintain part of who I am. But when it comes to it i'm so scared and so lost and so hurt. It's not like this is easy. I needed my best friend back and i'm so thankful you are back. But at the same time I've changed my personality so much now it's like who am I? In a lot of ways seems I'm becoming what I always opposed. Why?
 

Cant express feelings.....

I can't even fully express the feelings I have rushing through me. I am both hurt, heartbroken, confused, yet hopeful optimistic too. I don't know where you stand still and I just keep wanting to cry and bury myself somewhere. I just can't imagine you completely regretting and pushing aside everything we meant to each other. I just wish you could read this and see into my heart....there isn't a doubt in my mind how much I love you and how we belong together. I am not going to beg you or hunt you down....I'm simply going to wait here where you left me never loving you any less and cherishing every single memory we have made and holding out hope for many many more to come. :/ I.love.you. Please don't stay gone.

I Am!
by John Clare
I am! yet what I am none cares or knows, My friends forsake me like a memory lost; I am the self-consumer of my woes, They rise and vanish in oblivious host, Like shades in love and death's oblivion lost; And yet I am! and live with shadows tost Into the nothingness of scorn and noise, Into the living sea of waking dreams, Where there is neither sense of life nor joys, But the vast shipwreck of my life's esteems; And e'en the dearest—that I loved the best— Are strange—nay, rather stranger than the rest. I long for scenes where man has never trod; A place where woman never smil'd or wept; There to abide with my creator, God, And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept: Untroubling and untroubled where I lie; The grass below—above the vaulted sky.

Truths

Life-
not all it may seem-
dark, trying
wanting to be done

Smiles-
not always true-
hiding hurt
behind a mask of lies

Tears-
not always a sign of weakness-
strong cry too
just may not always be noticed

Laughter-
not always genuine-
forced, fake
no telling what is really on the mind

Hearts-
not unbreakable-
strong, fragile
treat with care or it'll be gone

 Truth? -
not always clear-
present, important
do you know what is really truths?

Control Freaks

There is so much pain, hurt, and control in this world. Why would someone who is suppose to help benefit another cause harm on them. There is such a thing as guidance and then becoming an oppressive obsessive person who is a control freak is an all together different thing. Don't they realize their actions simply push people away. They aren't benefiting anyone and frankly they should soon realize that they do not have ultimate control over everyone. It's just one of those moments where you shake your head wondering what on earth goes through people's minds when acting like that.

Simply I just wonder

I wish I had a magic looking glass that would allow me to see into the future and hopefully see my life as I imagine it will be. I wonder who will be there with me, next to me still making me smile and laugh, I wonder what I will be doing... simply I just wonder! ♥ ~

Life experiences influence reactions

Learned today that the way I interpret things is because of life experiences. Usually how we look at life depends on the different experiences we have had throughout our own life. One person may read or view on thing a certain way because of a past negative event they went through, while another may see it completely differently because of something they went through. So see when you want to make a joke about someone maybe reacting in what you think is a 'weird way' to something which you think is normal. Stop and don't judge! Because we never know for sure where those emotions and reactions are coming from.

People types

Oh People.Yes people in general. The more time i spend around people and the more I learn the more I realize that in many ways I can't stand people!

There are people who are like dictators. Be it at work, family, school, or just public life. These people decide that they are right and insist on attempting to enforce their view on others, and keep everyone trapped below them. Their power comes from the amount of control and 'brain-washing' they can achieve. They will not tolerate being proven wrong or argued against. These are the people who make standing up for your own opinions and believes terribly trying and hard.There are too many people today running businesses, famalies, schools, and so on like this...why do you think our world is in so much turmoil?

There are people who can be described in two words...hypocrites and fakes. These are the people who say one thing and do another. They set out to only put themselves ahead and they put their abilities to work in fooling the world and people. They do not hesitate to jump at an opportunity to 'act the part' when it isn't even relatively close to their true selves. They change their personality depending on the people,place, and situation...true sincerity is far from one of their qualities. These people often are the ones who give people groups bad names because they are vocal and unafraid to flaunt what they feel they have achieved.

There are also people who are so nieve and are easily walked on. These people see the world in only a positive light. They are willing to willingly follow what 'leaders' decide to do and rarely question it. They often times open themselves up to being taken advantage of and consistently, and not always on purpose, put themselves much lower than others. They do not acknowledge doubts about a persons intentions and often times end up hurt or in a bad situation because they turned a blind eye to a situation.

There are people who simply don't care what you think about them. Now this can be both a negative or positive way to live. When you don't spend all of your time worried about what people may think of you or what they may decide is right or wrong for you (if unreasonable) you often accomplish more. However if you go to the extreme and just go completely wild it will not be beneficial for you at all. When you are able to laugh at yourself and speak your mind freely you have a better grasp of where you fit in and where you can be affective. Striving to Not let people control you or your emotions often is beneficial because you no longer worry about what they think of you.

There are also people who have sincere hearts and intentions.These people are the ones who are die hard and sincere about thier passions. They speak their mind and they share passionately what are their believes and why. These people will not shy away from engaging you in a discussion and they often times will be excited for the chance. They are not motivated by personal fame or glory, it is often a much deeper connection. When you encounter these people they can be described as this a 'real person' they will be 'real with you'. There aren't many smoke and mirrors present 'what you see is what you get'.

Well these are just 5 types of people I tend to come into contact with alot, at least I have been lately, and there are many others I could list. We need to remember though that although we all fit a category we do not need to waste our time judging. Because we have ourselves to be consious of and responsible for.